


Succumbing

by Blackghost7



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst, First Kiss, First Time Blow Jobs, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-27
Updated: 2015-02-27
Packaged: 2018-03-15 12:46:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3447719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blackghost7/pseuds/Blackghost7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gibbs succumbs. So does Tony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Succumbing

Gibbs watched Tony sweeping around the store, picking up things and putting them down again, running his fingers over the items on display, joyful enthusiasm on Tony’s face with every new knickknack he discovered, always touching, and Gibbs wished those nimble fingers would touch him with the same wonder and sense of discovery. Gibbs hated shopping, but seeing Tony’s enjoyment made it all worthwhile, made him forget he was actually in a store. It was always this way when Tony was concerned, Gibbs would always give in and do things he abhorred just to make Tony smile. It was a weakness of his, but one Gibbs didn’t mind having, because whenever he made Tony smile, that genuine smile, Gibbs felt a little stab of happiness in his chest, and that made it all worth it. Everybody thought Abby was the one who had Gibbs wrapped around her pigtails, with her kisses and hugs, but in truth it was Tony who could get Gibbs to do anything. So when Tony had asked Gibbs for a favor the previous day, there was no hesitation on Gibbs’ part before he agreed. Sometimes Gibbs wondered whether Tony knew about the hold he had over Gibbs, but if he did, Tony never blatantly made use of it.  
   
   
“Hey Gibbs, can I ask you a favor?”  
   
“What do you need, DiNozzo?”  
   
“Can I borrow your truck tomorrow?”  
   
“Sure. Why?”  
   
“I ordered a new cabinet a couple of weeks ago, and it has arrived at the store, so I can go pick it up tomorrow. But it won’t fit in my car.”  
   
“No problem. Need any help carrying?”  
   
“I’ll get one of the guys at the store to help me.”  
   
“Then who’ll help you when you get it home? I’ll come with you.”  
   
“You sure? I don’t want to impose…”  
   
“Nonsense. I’ll pick you up at ten tomorrow morning.”  
   
“Thanks, Boss.”  
   
   
So that Saturday morning, Gibbs had put some blankets and a tarp in the back of the truck to protect the cabinet with, and drove over to Tony’s place. The younger man was already waiting for him on the curb outside his building, and after he got into the car, handed Gibbs one of the travel mugs of coffee he had with him. Gibbs sipped and sighed in appreciation when he found the coffee strong and exactly to his taste. Thanking Tony for it, he pulled away from the curb and followed Tony’s directions to the store.  
   
Once at the store, Gibbs eyed the cabinet Tony had chosen appreciatively. It was a fine piece. Of course, Gibbs could have made something similar himself, and would have if he had known Tony was looking for it, but Tony had never mentioned it. As soon as they had loaded the cabinet into the truck and secured it, blankets and tarp protecting it, Tony asked Gibbs whether he would mind if Tony took another look around the store. Gibbs shrugged his consent and followed Tony back inside, where he had stood watching the younger man explore the store. Tony found a small side table he also liked, and a table lamp, then moved to the bedding department where he instantly fell in love with a huge fluffy duvet and matching pillows which he simply had to have once he’d touched them, and of course had to be accompanied by new high thread count sheets which were conveniently on display right next to the duvets.  
   
When at last Tony was paying for the other items, Gibbs was surprised to note that they had been in there for over an hour, and he had never once been bored or annoyed the way he would be when one of his wives had dragged him along on a shopping spree, and shook his head at himself in derisive amusement. God, he had it bad for Tony, and it had been getting worse and worse as the years passed. He sometimes entertained thoughts of telling Tony, letting him know how he felt, but always thought better of it in the end. Tony wasn’t interested in him that way, and he didn’t want to jeopardize the relationship they had. Better keep quiet and keep his longing to himself. But that was getting harder to do these days, and Gibbs found his hand lingering on the back of Tony’s head after a head slap, found his eyes drifting over to Tony’s desk more often while they worked, found himself breathing in deeply to catch Tony’s scent when they were in the car together, or when he stood close to him. He wished… no. Gibbs sighed, and stopped that thought before he became even more maudlin.  
   
Laden with Tony’s other purchases, they made their way back to the car and secured the other items as well, then drove back to Tony’s place. Gibbs carried the side table and lamp, and followed Tony who nearly disappeared under the huge duvet and pillows and packets of sheets into his apartment, setting the purchases down. Then they went back and carefully unloaded the cabinet, glad that the elevator was working and they didn’t have to carry the heavy burden up four flights of stairs. Leaving everything in the middle of the living room, Tony moved to the kitchen and started a fresh pot of coffee, then made them both some sandwiches for lunch. After having eaten at the kitchen counter, they went back to the living room where Tony grabbed the pillows and duvet to bring them to the bedroom, Gibbs following him with the sheets.  
   
Gibbs breathed in deeply when he entered Tony’s bedroom, and looked around curiously. The last time he had been here, Tony’s bedroom had only held a single bed, but that had now been replaced by a queen sized model. Thinking back to Senior’s visit at Christmas, Gibbs realized Tony must have replaced the bed after Senior had defiled Tony’s sanctuary with the neighbor lady, and he was glad for it. Gibbs didn’t like or trust Senior, and the less contact he had with Tony, the better it suited Gibbs, and the thought of Tony sleeping in the bed where Senior had… Gibbs barely managed to hide the shudder that ran through him at the thought. While Tony unwrapped the newly purchased sheets and put them in the washing machine, Gibbs started unwrapping the duvet and pillows, and when Tony came back, he gleefully replaced the old bedding for the new. He grinned widely at Gibbs.  
   
“I’m gonna sleep like a baby tonight, Boss!”  
   
Gibbs smiled back, thinking how much he wanted to be there for that, how much he wanted to curl around Tony under that fluffy duvet and hold him close all night, running his hands over that body that set him on fire. He swallowed hard and cleared his throat.  
   
“Good. Hope this means you’ll be well rested and at the office on time from now on.”  
   
Tony’s grin widened even further and his eyes sparkled with mischief.  
   
“I doubt it, Boss. I won’t be able to leave my bed once I’m all wrapped up in there. I think I’ll put in for some personal time and just hibernate for a while.”  
   
Gibbs chose not to answer to that, closing his eyes a moment to relish the picture in his mind of himself hibernating with Tony. Shaking his head to clear his mind, he turned and walked back to the living room. Gibbs gestured to the new cabinet when Tony joined him.  
   
“So, where do you want this?”  
   
“Over there. Or maybe over there.”  
   
Tony winced a little at his own indecision.  
   
“Well, let’s try it over there first.”  
   
And that was the start of almost two hours of moving furniture around, assessing the new arrangement, then trying something else. Warm from the exertion, both had stripped off their sweaters and worked in their t-shirts. When at last Tony was happy with where everything was, he looked around and was just in time to catch Gibbs when the older man stumbled over the edge of the rug he’d been tugging straight.  
   
“Whoah, careful Gibbs!”  
   
Tony caught Gibbs in his arms, and when he had him steadied, patted Gibbs’ back in a hug, thanking him for all his help. Gibbs sighed deeply and looked up into Tony’s eyes when the younger man pulled back, overwhelmed with the feeling of Tony’s arms around him. Looking up into those sparkling green eyes, Gibbs felt something break within him, and quickly leaned in and pressed his lips to Tony’s, placing a hand on the back of Tony’s neck to keep him in place. He felt Tony freeze, but Gibbs persisted. If he was only going to have one chance to do this, he had to make it count. He nibbled and licked at Tony’s lips almost in desperation, and only dared breathe again when he felt Tony relax a little, felt Tony’s lips begin to respond. When Tony’s mouth opened under his and their tongues met, Gibbs was in heaven. Gibbs wrapped his other arm around Tony's waist and pulled them closer together, wanting to feel every inch of Tony against him while the kiss continued. He felt Tony’s hands come up almost hesitatingly, and moaned when those hands caressed over his back. When Gibbs moved his mouth over Tony’s cheek to his neck to start nibbling and kissing there, he heard Tony suck in a deep breath. When he felt Tony’s dick twitch against his own, he heard a soft, almost surprised sound escaping the back of Tony’s throat. When Gibbs pulled back a little to look at Tony, one hand still on his neck and the other sliding from Tony’s shoulder down over his chest to his stomach, Gibbs saw an almost bewildered look in the younger man’s eyes.  
   
“Tony?”  
   
It came out husky and raspy, and he felt a shiver run through Tony’s body at the sound. Tony stared at him, his expression unreadable to Gibbs, and seemed to make a decision. Eyes still open and locked on Gibbs’, Tony leaned in and kissed him again. Gibbs closed his eyes and lost himself in the kiss, letting his hands wander over Tony’s body, feeling the muscles he had admired all these years shiver under his touch. When Tony pulled back and Gibbs opened his eyes, he found Tony’s gaze still locked on him, still unreadable. Hardly daring to breathe, Gibbs let his hands softly stroke over Tony’s chest and sides, then put them on Tony’s hips and pulled them together again.  
   
“Tony? I… I want…”  
   
Then Tony kissed him again, softly but with an odd determination, and Gibbs slid his hands under Tony’s t-shirt, sliding it up and off, then kissed down Tony’s neck and chest, stroking the strong muscles and nibbling at the skin, going down, down, down until he was on his knees and reaching for Tony’s jeans. Looking up at the younger man, he caught a nervousness in Tony’s eyes, but Tony made no move to stop him. Opening Tony’s jeans, Gibbs reached for the half-hard dick he found there and eagerly sucked it into his mouth, hearing a surprised groan from above. Tony got fully hard rapidly, and Gibbs feasted on him, his mind reeling with the heady taste and heavenly feel of Tony in his mouth. Softly stroking and playing with Tony, Gibbs brought the younger man closer and closer to the edge, and when Tony started bucking his hips a little, Gibbs sucked him down deeper, groaning in pleasure when he at last felt Tony’s hands slide into his hair. Looking up, Gibbs saw Tony’s head was thrown back, the tendons in his neck standing out sharply, and he thought Tony looked beautiful like this. One more stroke, one more swirl of his tongue, one more groan, and then Tony was spilling down his throat, shuddering with the release, a low moan escaping Tony’s lips. Gibbs kept his mouth on Tony until he had fully softened, slowly licking and sucking at the softening flesh, and only then did he get up again, caressing Tony’s chest on his way up, until he stood in front of him again. When he slowly leaned in to catch Tony’s lips in another kiss, Tony pulled back.  
   
“Tony?”  
   
“Gibbs, I…”  
   
Tony seemed to take a steadying breath, then reached out one hand and placed it over the bulge in Gibbs’ jeans, rubbing softly after a few seconds. He looked at the older man and spoke softly.  
   
“You want me to…?”  
   
The question trailed off as if Tony couldn’t bring himself to actually say it. Gibbs stared at him, and then Gibbs suddenly understood. The bewilderment, the surprise, the hesitation, the nervousness and then the determination. Tony had never done this before. Tony hadn’t been wanting this, craving this like Gibbs had. Tony had simply… allowed this. He had allowed Gibbs to do this, and would return the favor if asked, but he didn’t want this. But then why…?  
   
“Why did you let me?”  
   
“I would do anything for you, Gibbs.”  
   
The words hit him like a slap in the face.  
   
Gibbs fled.  
   
   
   
The weeks that followed were pure hell. Every attempt Tony made to talk to Gibbs was rejected by the older man. At work, Gibbs only appeared in the bullpen when he absolutely had to, and the team had no idea where he spent his time when he wasn’t there. Tony’s calls were ignored, texts went unanswered. When Tony went to Gibbs’ house, he found it dark and deserted several nights in a row, Gibbs’ car missing from the driveway.  
   
   
   
Tony had been in turmoil ever since it had happened. When Gibbs had kissed him, he had been shocked. That he found it pleasurable was even more shocking. That it was Gibbs was the greatest shock of all. When he found himself getting hard, he had been surprised. When Gibbs caressed him, he had shivered in pleasure. When Gibbs sank to his knees and took him into his mouth, he had realized that this felt better than anything he had ever experienced and it had been a struggle not to come immediately and embarrass himself. He regretted that he had not taken the opportunity to touch Gibbs more, but the surreal nature of what was happening had him fumbling like a virgin, which he was in a way, if you only counted experiences with men. When Gibbs got up and stood in front of him again, he had hesitated due to inexperience, but had wanted to make Gibbs feel as good as Gibbs had made him feel, and when he reached out his hand and cupped Gibbs through his pants, that hardness had felt good in his hand and he had wanted more. He hadn’t been sure if he could do what Gibbs had just done, but he wanted to explore and touch, certain that he could give Gibbs pleasure, and he wanted to. But Gibbs had spotted his hesitation and had drawn his conclusions, and when Gibbs had asked him why, Tony had said the stupidest thing he’d ever said. His only excuse was that he was still coming down from his climax and a little hazy from the rollercoaster of thoughts running through his mind, but as soon as the words had left his mouth, he wanted to take them back. Gibbs hadn’t given him the chance to.  
   
Tony had spent the remainder of the weekend trying to figure things out for himself, trying to find out what had happened and how he felt about it. The physical part was easy. He had thoroughly enjoyed it. More than that, it had been phenomenal, better than anything. He didn’t care that Gibbs was a man, he just cared that it was Gibbs. And that led to the other part, the part that he wasn’t so good with, and neither was Gibbs. The emotional part. Once he realized that it was the fact that it was Gibbs touching him that had made it so fantastic, he thought about why that would be. And slowly but surely the picture became clear. Years of history between the two of them, taking care of each other, sometimes even when the other didn’t want them to. Looking out for each other, trusting each other. Trust. Not something either one of them gave easily, but they trusted each other implicitly. When anything was bothering him, he went to Gibbs. When he was hurt, he went to Gibbs. When he was uncertain, he went to Gibbs. And Gibbs was always there for him. When he looked at it that way, Tony finally understood the connection he felt with Gibbs that had been there from the beginning, but had grown stronger over the years. The need he felt to stay with Gibbs, even over offered promotions. The way he dropped everything and everyone as soon as Gibbs needed him, whether for the job or something else.  
   
The only reason the thought of love and Gibbs had never clicked together in Tony’s mind, was that it was… Gibbs. His boss. A man. Gibbs. Tony laughed at himself until his sides ached and tears were streaming down his cheeks. He was an idiot. And now he had a silver fox to catch and drag back to his den.  
   
Because Tony may be an idiot when it came to love, but he did know one thing. Gibbs would never have kissed him, would never have touched him like that if he didn’t mean it. Gibbs would never be overcome by lust or want and act on it for a fling. Gibbs was steadfast and old-fashioned and serious, and Gibbs would only ever approach someone like that if he was serious about them. So that must mean that Gibbs loved him. The thought was almost overwhelming, but he felt a happy warmth grow in his chest. Now he just had to get Gibbs to forgive him for his stupidity.  
   
And that was where he hit the snag. Gibbs refused to talk to him, refused to acknowledge him even. Wasn’t at the house when Tony went over there night after night. Gibbs all but disappeared. Tony only saw him for what felt like a few minutes every day, and he didn’t like what he saw. Gibbs looked tired, and, impossible as it may seem, distressed. Had the force of his personality not still exuded strength, Tony would have said Gibbs was wasting away. Whenever Tony observed him, Gibbs looked like he was hurting. And the few times Tony managed to actually catch Gibbs’ eyes, Tony saw shame. Tony didn’t like it, didn’t like it at all. After weeks of this, Tony had had enough. He packed a bag and bought some groceries, and went over to Gibbs’ house, finding it dark and deserted as he had expected. But this time he didn’t leave. He went inside and made himself at home, cooking dinner for himself and falling asleep on the couch later that night. Gibbs didn’t show up. When Tony saw him at work the following morning, he didn’t mention having slept at Gibbs’ place, and that evening he went back there. It was three days later, on Saturday morning, that he woke up to find Gibbs had finally come home.  
   
   
Gibbs was cursing himself every second his mind was not occupied with something work related. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw what had happened at Tony’s apartment play out again, and felt more disgusted with himself at each replay. While his mind tried to tell him that it wasn’t really how it had happened, his heart told him that he had practically raped Tony, and he couldn’t even look at the man without feeling the shame burn through his soul. He took the coward’s way out and hid, loathing himself for his behavior both that day and now in the aftermath, but he simply couldn’t face Tony. Every time Gibbs looked at Tony, his heart twisted in revulsion at himself. He hid himself in his cabin at night, and sought out empty conference rooms and quiet stairways during the day, hiding away in shame. He couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, and drank too much. He was a wreck, and he deserved to be, chastising himself for everything he had ever done to Tony. He couldn’t even hope for forgiveness.  
   
Returning to his house to pick up more clothes that Saturday morning, he was surprised to see Tony’s car parked in the driveway. Making his way quietly inside his own house, he spotted Tony asleep on the couch. A quick look around told him Tony had been there for a few days already, clothes strewn around, dishes in the sink, remains of half eaten dinners in the trash. He figured Tony was there for the reckoning, and decided it was time to face it. He sat on the coffee table next to the couch, watching Tony’s face relaxed in sleep, drinking in the beloved features for what he was sure would be the last time. To say he was surprised at what happened next would be an understatement.  
   
   
As soon as Tony opened his eyes, he saw Gibbs sitting there, body tense, hands clasped together, knuckles almost white. In a single second, Tony was off the couch and on top of Gibbs on the coffee table, which instantly collapsed under their combined weight, but neither seemed to notice as Tony wrapped his arms tightly around Gibbs, pressing his face into the older man’s neck, pinning him down with his weight and breathing deeply to inhale the scent of the man he loved. When Tony hadn’t moved for what seemed like minutes, Gibbs tentatively brought up his hands which he had held clenched tightly at his sides until then, and very carefully touched Tony’s sides. When Tony didn’t respond, Gibbs slowly slid his hands up to Tony’s back, until he held the younger man in a tentative embrace. Then, he felt Tony relax on top of him, and sigh deeply against Gibbs’ neck before he raised his head to look into Gibbs’ eyes.  
   
“Don’t ever disappear on me again, Jethro.”

They both knew Gibbs wasn't responding to Tony's plea with his next words.

"I'm sorry, Tony. I'm so, so sorry…"

Tony stared down at him in wonder.

"What for?"

"Tony?"

"Oh! You mean that afternoon at my place! Why would you be sorry for that?"

"Because I…"

"Gave me the most intense orgasm of my life? Showed me you loved me? That someone in this world finally thinks I'm good enough to be loved?"

Gibbs felt his anger rising.

"That's your father talking. Of course, you're good enough to be loved! Better! Perfect!"

Tony's smile was radiant. 

"See! I knew you loved me! As soon as I got my head out of my ass and thought about a few things, I knew that you must love me, because you never would do something like that if you didn't love the person, but I just never would have imagined it would be me, and it was just so amazing, and I'm sorry I screwed it up by being an idiot, and I'm sorry for what I said, I really didn't mean the way it sounded, but I did mean it, I really would do anything for you, but I didn't know why and I really didn't mean that I would let you fuck me just because you wanted to if I didn't have any feelings for you as well, but you do want to right, because I really want you to, even though I've never done that before, but I trust you and isn't that just telling of how much I feel for you, because you know the way I am with trusting people, and I should have realized much sooner exactly what it meant that I trusted you from day one, but I just didn't get it until…"

Gibbs shut Tony up with a kiss. When he felt Tony had been sufficiently dazed, he released Tony's lips and stared up at him again.

"I felt like I had… like I had…"

"No! No no no no, Gibbs! Don't go there! Is that why you..? Damn! I wanted to! I wanted you! But you wouldn't even talk to me, and how was I supposed to know that you were thinking like that, I mean, it's not like you ever let anyone in, but I saw it in your eyes, and it hurt so much even if I didn't understand exactly why you were looking like that and I…"

Judging he hadn't shut Tony up sufficiently yet, Gibbs pulled Tony's head down into another kiss. They remained locked together for several minutes, playing with each other's tongues, conveying all they really felt in that perfect kiss. When at last they pulled apart, Gibbs caught Tony's eyes again before he spoke.

"I'm sorry. I love you. I want you."

"I know."

Gibbs waited for the litany to start again, but those were the only two words Tony spoke as a reply. Tony gazed down into Gibbs' eyes, a slow grin starting on his face as he watched Gibbs wait for him to continue into another rant. The longer Gibbs waited, the broader Tony's smile became. When Gibbs started twitching uncomfortably against the broken shards of wood of the demolished coffee table digging into his back, Tony grinned brighter. When Gibbs raised his eyebrows questioningly, shifting his eyes from Tony to the ceiling hiding his bedroom and back, Tony's grin grew insanely wide. Then, showing the restraint no one ever thought Tony capable of, Tony spoke the five words that made Gibbs' life complete.

"I love you too, Jethro."

Of course, Tony just couldn't leave it at that.

"So, would you please take me upstairs and fuck me, and love me for the rest of eternity?"

Gibbs needed decidedly less words to get his point across. Grabbing Tony's hand and raising their interlaced fingers to his lips to kiss them, Gibbs looked into Tony's eyes and said all he needed to.

"Forever."


End file.
